Because the poster for season 2 intrigues me and I figure that with just twelve episodes, it will not be difficult to spend today watching all of season one while doing homework.
- “We’ve got bats!” Yeah, because THAT’S going to protect you little shits.
- Creepiest intro to a show in ages.
- Wow, Ben. You’re kind an asshole.
- Violet, I kind of like you.
- Whoa, what’s the deal with that chick and the cigarettes. Settle it down, bro.
- Adelaide not liking Go Diego Go kind of amuses me.
- Constance, you’re kind of a bitch and you’re also kinda creepy, but you’re also played by Jessica Lange so I have a feeling I’m going to like you anyway? Your one-liners are pretty zingy.
- That mural hiding behind the wallpaper? Also kind of creepy.
- Wow, Tate.
- What the fuck was that over his corner?
- Wooooow, Tate. Fucking wow. You are creepier than Constance.
- NAKED BUTTS!
- The fuck was that whole deal with the maid? She was old and then she was young (and hot) and then she was old and then she was young (and hot)…
- Morrissey reference. Of course, because they’re misanthropic teenagers…
- Dylan McDermot is naked a lot in this pilo—WHOA HOT MASTURBATING MAID. But Ben is all DO NOT WANT.
- Except then he goes and masturbates alone. And cries when he comes. Um. Awkward.
- “Am I distracting you?” YES, Moira. You’re too goddamn hot when you’re trying to seduce him. And why are you seducing him anyway? He’s not all that hot. He’s also kind of a dick.
- Ben stop trying to fuck your wife. She’s not having any of your shit, Ben.
- “I can’t even look at you without seeing the expression on your face while you were PILEDRIVING HER in our bed!” *proceeds to die of laughter*
- “We haven’t had sex in over a year.” WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING, BEN. WHAT. WHAT DOES IT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING.
- WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED. The guy in the rubber suit was fucking Vivian while Ben stands downstairs playing with the stove? And then Constance shows up and tells him to go back to bed and then…? What the fuck. What the fucking fuck is going the fuck on.
- WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT. Tate what the fuck, bro. What the hell.
- “Don’t make me kill you again.” Whaaaat?
- AND THEN SHE’S PREGNANT WHAT THE FUCK.